Credit: Found On Internet

Oh why do I care about the Pigeon Detectives? Hyperbole band if ever I heard one. But you never know, one might be surprised I mean… Crystal Castles are great, despite my initial fears. The Pigeon Detectives sold 70,000 tickets of there recent tour – TO WHO? Am I so out of touch by thinking ‘This Is an Emergency’ is utter twallup?

From the slow pace and pretty uninspired guitar parts, to the intro which basically goes Doh Ray Me Fa So. Yes that is right: lesson one at music school. But that isn’t fair - simple songs can be great. ‘Horse with No Name’ by America is all played on one fret, after all. If a song has feeling, and the lyrics are vaguely touching, you can get away with no musicianship at all. So how do the lyrics cope?

Shouted in a oasisque manner at us - uh... Ok but I can still imagine some teenybopper singing along. What are they singing?

"I’m not here to reflect you"
"I wish your friends would leave me alone"
"And I could never connect too; to people that weren’t from back home"
"This is an Emergency"

Oh

What a c*nt. Ooh, touring getting you down, darling, is it? The pressures of 70,000 indie rock fans doing your vacuous little brain in? I tell you what, emergency wipe-my-arse boy … Just stop. Just stop. Simple; Stop. Save everybody’s precious time and stop writing music or taking Universal's money away from decent bands. As the only the only emergency here is that my PC won’t eject the CD fast enough.