Are you a massive idiot? Do you have trouble washing properly and find yourself constantly wearing clothes two sizes too small? Do local primary school children run in fear from you, and local secondary school kids throw stones at you at the bus stop?

This is probably because you don't like Eels. Even the fact that they are the favourite band of my cheating harridan of an ex-girlfriend can't stop me loving Eels. Which is why Music Towers has got so excited that they are releasing a Best-Of as well as a Rarities album, with both coming out on January 21 next year. Oh, and a subsequent UK tour. We're so hyper that we're medically incapable of injesting anything with caffeine for the next 2 hours or we might die of heart failure.

Yes, it's that exciting.

Here are the live dates in question:

Feb 25 2008 London, Royal Festival Hall
Feb 26 2008 Birmingham, Town Hall
Feb 27 2008 Manchester, Bridgewater Hall
Feb 28 2008 Glasgow, Royal Concert Hall
Mar 1 2008 Gateshead, Sage
Mar 2 2008 Brighton, Dome

In other news for fellow Eels fans, frontman Mark Oliver Everett, was on BBC4 on Monday night (27 November 2007), fronting a documentary about his father, the late Hugh Everett III, entitled 'Parallel Universes, Parallel Lives'. Why? Only because Hugh Everett III was one of the leading thinkers on Quantum Physics of the last century. And it was pretty damn good.